Its January – Forget resolve and apply Kindness

I read something last week that resonated with me. It was that we should forget making resolutions to do this or that, or give something up (spot the psychological error there!) and instead just make a list of all the things we would like to experience in 2018.

It’s entirely the wrong time of year for all this business anyway. We are only just past mid-winter. We are meant to be living with the seasons and doing what nature does. Slowing down. Conserving energy. Trusting the process.

Intention setting is important of course. How are we ever to move towards living our best lives if we are not first able to get clear on how we want them to look. But if things aren’t seeming all that clear right now then that is OK. Leave it alone. Rest up and trust that all will become clearer in the fullness of time.

My own experience of New Years Resolutions has often been to make big grand lists of things I was going to ‘do’ or ‘have’ and then beat myself up when I ‘failed’ to achieve them. When I moved to Intention Setting things loosened up in terms of less focus on ‘doing’ and ‘having’ although it has taken me a while to work out that the dark days of early January might not be best time for this kind of work.

One of the things I take most from Buddhist teachings is the degree to which we cause our own suffering. So much of our suffering is experienced in the gap between how things are, and how we thought they would be. New Years Resolutions/Intention Setting is either an opportunity to create our best lives in partnership with universal laws of abundance and attraction, or a way of setting ourselves up for suffering.

Maybe what we need most right now is permission to do nothing. Outside of the things we absolutely have to do. To rest and eat well and to dream a little of all the things we would like to experience in the coming year. And if nothing is coming then that is OK. Leave it alone and it will.

2 Responses

  1. Jo This is such a great post, just what i needed to read. And so true, the mindset of 'intention setting' as opposed to 'resolutions' makes complete sense especially as you quite rightly say, in this dark and rather depressing post Festive time.I love your idea of moving with nature, conserving and slowing down. My only bugbear is that my friends on the other side of the world in Australia are enjoying the sun! They don't have to deal with these dark days and cold winds! Jo Fretwell
    • Jo Taylor
      Hello Thank you for your feedback Jo. Lovely to hear from you. You are right I think. If I was in Australia right now I might be more inclined to make resolutions. But as it is I am going to throw another log on the fire and switch on netflix! xx

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